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My Solution To The Olympics Problem

I was reading at http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5850632/ that many sports are going to have a harder time getting included in the Olympics in the future. The International Olympic Committee recently re-evaluated each of the 28 "sports" included in the summer games to determine which should remain. Here's my proposal:

"A sport may remain if and only if it can be reasonably and briefly expressed in terms of the greatest family of sports--hockey"

This results in:

  • [summer]
  • field hockey
  • soccer (foot hockey)
  • handball (hand hockey)
  • water polo (water hockey)
  • polo (horse hockey)
  • boxing (net-less hockey)
  • street hockey (new!)
  • roller hockey (new!)
  • [winter]
  • ice hockey
  • ice soccer (new!)
  • ice handball (new!)
  • ice polo (new!)
  • ice boxing (new!)

Let me know if I left anything off.

Posted: Aug 30 2004, 11:24 AM by EdKaim | with 9 comment(s)
Filed under:

Comments

Mike said:

Do the horses get medals in Polo since they do most of the athletic work?
# August 30, 2004 2:37 PM

Craig Thrall said:

Sailing (collisions = boat hockey)
# August 30, 2004 2:43 PM

Hurling said:

You missed Hurling (not to be confused with Curling...). It's like Field Hockey but shoulder-high stick swinging is allowed:

http://images.google.com/images?q=hurling&num=100

Very few teeth remain after most matches.
# August 30, 2004 2:47 PM

Steve Hall said:

Ice Baseball - sliding into any of the bases would be a LOT more fun! (Of course, stretch leotards would still be required...)

Ice Cycling - no tire studs (or brakes) allowed!
# August 30, 2004 3:51 PM

Sean said:

What about Air Hockey? or is that volleyball?
# August 30, 2004 3:53 PM

Steve K. said:

Could we add Golf, or Loner hockey?
# August 30, 2004 4:25 PM

Steven said:

I'll take any hockey I can get if they are locked out!! Great idea Ed!
# August 30, 2004 6:53 PM

Dan DeSalvo said:

I think you would have to leave in the ice skating events (puckless hockey) but only full contact skating alla Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan.
# August 31, 2004 3:41 PM

Keith Patrick said:

How exactly is boxing related to hockey? I mean, boxing is my favorite sport, and IMO one of the purest sports, but there is no ball/object that is being battled over, and there is not place to put said object (a goal). In boxing, the object is to impose one's physical will over another to the point where the other ceases to compete, whereas hockey is a standard ball-goal game.
Hell, if you want to talk about expressing an Olympic sport in terms of a ball-goal game, why not use an older ball-goal sport? It's like saying a language is only a real language if it's like C#, even though it's one of the most recent of that family of languages.
# September 28, 2004 11:07 PM
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