The scary reality of being a published author
Last night, someone pointed out that my book is already listed on Amazon. I'm a little freaked out by this, in part because it's not even done yet. We've got one more round of editorial review.
I'm not sure exactly why I'm freaked out. I started my professional life working in radio as on-air talent. It's a very visible job where people think you're famous (because they don't know how little you actually make). That never bothered me, and I wasn't worried about being judged or whatever. This is so different from that, perhaps because programming books are not something read by stupid people, or top 40 listeners. ;)
I have a lot of anxiety because if the book sucks, the feedback indicating this is very visible in terms of bad reviews online and a lack of royalty checks down the road. Yes, despite the occassional pissing match I get into online, I'm ridiculously insecure. I think my strength is teaching, not necessarily all encompasing knowledge. The reviewers say I know my stuff, but for some reason that's not comforting.
On the upside, it's nice to know that I'm in the home stretch now. Writing a book is a lot harder than I thought it would be. I don't think I could have done it while working a regular day job. It's not that it's exactly time consuming, but it's very difficult to stay focused on it. Regardless, a month from now, it'll be out of my hands and all I can do is hope for the best when it hits the stores in the spring.