This wasn't the excuse note you were looking for
Dear Employer,
Please excuse Bil Simser from
work on Thursday, May 19. He is not feeling well. Bil is
at home in bed for the entire day, nursing what appears
to be a serious hamster attack. Bil’s illness is in no
way, shape or form related to the premiere of the final
installment of the greatest story ever, which,
coincidentally, premieres on the same date.
While
I cannot confirm nor deny that Bil has called my
company, Geek Squad, asking to be set up with wireless
access “in case of a space opera-related sick day” know
that if you do receive an e-mail from your prized
employee today, it is most likely because
He was
wise enough to plan ahead in the event of illness.
But
as I mentioned before, Bil is at home, safely in bed,
but reachable (in dire emergencies) by e-mail or
cell.
One more thing. Beginning at 12:00PM
MST, Bil Simser will be unreachable for about two hours,
thirteen minutes and eleven seconds. He will be feeling
really bad at this time.
This wasn’t the
excuse note you were looking for,
Robert
Stephens
Geek Squad
— Chief Inspector